I use chopsticks or disposable latex gloves to eat sandwiches, chocolate, basically any finger food, because in my opinion, it's impossible to get that greasy, sticky film off my fingers.

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Become paranoid that this is not the real world, and instead is some coma induced dream.

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Contract my gluteus maximus while sitting for a long time to feel more comfortable.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When watching a heavy action movie and you suddenly start thinking about how much it would cost to repair the damages made in the movie.

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After watching a movie, always walk out the theatre feeling like a total bad ass

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avoid going in the handicap bathroom stall because you're afraid someone will see you cause it's so big

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Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

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shag your mom

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You laugh to yourself when you think you are alone in a street but then you notice somebody in a car looking at you.

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Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

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Think that everything has feelings for example, a cushion or a tree

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I ejaculate fire and glory

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Wasting a whole bunch of time trying to find how to make one and realizing it was at the top and that you forgot what you were going to put in the first place.

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When changing the volume one my computer it has to be a multiple of 2

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being a mid-teenager, never having a relationship before and don't care at all.

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If someone asks me if I want something and they get up to get it and im sitting down, I say " oh I can get it" eventhough they are already up just to not seem like a lazy piece of shit

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Create my response for the whole conversation before even having it

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Leave the television on in my room when I go to bed, so I have some light and I can't hear all the creepy sounds that houses make.

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When I fart I immediately go 'Eww. Who farted? That's gross'. And I blame it on someone else, always works :)

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Find different ways to crack your knuckles when you're bored. (I have found 7 ways to crack a finger and I can crackj my hand back

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Whatever situation I am in, I always start to invent rhythms with everything i have around, e.g. my legs, voice, tables or sometimes even the ground.

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Sometimes I see on the clock, the seconds needle go back 1 second and then never do that again for the rest of the day/week or whenever I'm staring at the clock for it to happen again. -Mike

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When in long car rides I imagine a little man running or on roller skates next to the car. When A car comes he turns into a ninja and can slide under/jump over or cut the car in half.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.