Tried to stuff yourself in the fridge

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Slate the game you playing but always go back for more...ie FIFA, Cod!!!

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When taking trash up to the street, I always runback as fast as I can, counting down from 5, pretending there's a sniper about to shoot me.

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When your the only one home and you hear a slight creak be like I HEARD THAT to scare of any serial killers.

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even though you know you turned the light off, you have to go check before you can get to sleep

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I'm in a hurry I press the elevator button several times

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Say you're not hungry at a friend's house when his/her parents offer you food, even though you're starving

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Think about blinking, and then realize that when you think about blinking, you can't stop thinking about blinking, and thus a 3-4 minute awkward blinking-fest begins.

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Aim at shit stains whilst I pee.

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i eat choclate buns on easter for breakfast lunch and dinner.

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Breathe.

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im going to RAPEEEE that girl

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Whenever I leave a phone message, I feel like I'm leaving the last message I will every leave to my family in my life because I will somehow die soon. I've watched too much drama.

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I'm 30, but to this day I still have fantasies about rescuing the girl that I'm secretly in love with from a dangerous situation. The fantasies get increasingly ridiculous, sometimes they even involve superhero stuff. It's as if my own mind was trying to let me know that I should grow the f*** up.

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always picture someone naked even though sometime you really don't want to.

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Suck up stuff with the vacuum you know you shouldn't because your too lazy to pick it up.

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Think about things I should be doing with my life.

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after doing the dishes i get my hands wet after putting my jumper on cause i failed 2 dry my hands propley my arms a f***** cold dammit!!

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When you accidentally mess up a password, delete the entire thing and redo it since you don't know which part you messed up.

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I pee in the shower.

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wipe the bottle lid before i drink because i dont whant to taste what the other person had in there mouth...

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Eat something that will make crumbs over the sink because you are too lazy to get a plate

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Sometimes I reflexively say "ouch" when I drop an inanimate object and I'm not even hurt.

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Handing something to a friend or someone and all you can think is "...I've fapped with that hand. And they know I have" even though you clean up after you feel like your jizz is gonna be on what you gave them and theyll find out amd think you're disgusting.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.