I scratch and sniff.

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

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You question gods existence and evolution but then quickly tell herself hes real so you don't get struck with a lighting bolt

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When two people in my house are arguing, I stay in my room to avoid awkwardly interrupting them and being dragged into it.

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Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

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When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

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When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

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Try to figure out if some of the posts were written by the same person.

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When ever i watch a movie with my parents i hope to god there is no nudity or awkward sex talk

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I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

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Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

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in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

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only read the short jokes on this website

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I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

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Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

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I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

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I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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fap

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When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

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No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.