Thinking something embarrassing, then having to talk to someone and suddenly getting worried you are about to blurt out your thoughts

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Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

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I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

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(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

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Wonder if the life your living is one long dream and your gonna wake up and be some type of alien.

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whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

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Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

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fap

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

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When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

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When you are thinking, and you think about what you are thinking. You are automatically purposely thinking until you stop thinking about it. I am thinking about thinking about how I think right now. I think...

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I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

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Read the time on your watch, then after a few minutes, read it again because you forgot it.

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

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Sitting down in the shower

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Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

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Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

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When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

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try to give your friends spirit animals

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Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

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Thinking your life is a movie...

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When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

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When I am bored I look at things and wonder about the people who made them, and at what time they were made, etc. Like whether my Bic pen was made in the morning or the night. Savy.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.