- Things You Think Only You Do

Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

You feel like someone can read your mind so you try not to think about stupid stuff.

I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

Only use the left earphone.

Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

Sitting down in the shower

trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Scratch inside my ear, then lick the finger I used.

Everytime aplane is flying low you think it's going to crash right in front of your eyes

Left alone Big noise, people aren't expected back as soon so grab baseball bat and charge only to find them back early...."what you doing?" "batting my socks around practising my baseball skills"

Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

Put my hands together the 'other' way

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.