Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

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Accidentally scratching a surface and then scratching it again with the tops of your fingernails to even it out.

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Try to figure out if some of the posts were written by the same person.

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Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

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Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

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While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

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fap

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

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Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

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When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

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When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

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After getting up from the grass, I use my foot to move the grass I was sitting on around so that there isn't a butt print in the grass.

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I **** with no hands.

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I sometimes deliberately miss buses or trains even though I could easily board them.

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

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get a new *to you* car, and suddenly every other car on the road is the same make/ model..... hey look! an outback!

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judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

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After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

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Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

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Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

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You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.