Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

thumb_up thumb_down -70

I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -82

Write something down here so that it seems like you think its normal when your actually really paranoid that its not.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

thumb_up thumb_down +31

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

When no one is home, I poop with the door open, just because I can.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Half of these posts are all but "things you think only you do". So is mine

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I get more creeped out the more I read the comments here, especially as the comments start getting really low thumbs ups.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whenever someone enters a pin number I always try to see how many number I can remember

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Feel like something is behind you/watching you, run to your room super quickly and get into the room before that something gets you

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Think of the most awkward or dreadful thing you could possibly do in any given situation and be almost compelled to do it but then realising that you could never show your face anywhere ever again if you did.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

only read the short jokes on this website

thumb_up thumb_down -41

I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.