When you start wondering if you're in a dream and suddenly feel trapped

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Imagine flying things and epic battles when listening to music.

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if your listening to music, move the volume up and down to experience the bass a lil better

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I don't use my car air conditioning because I think it's wasteful and it might "run-out" when I'm REALLY, REALLY hot.

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Mares really turn me on, so I download "bad stuff" Ironically though, I worked at a farm last summer and realized there is nothing more disgusting than reality. Still mares turn me on... If on video.

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Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

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I still hum songs that I made up when I was a little kid

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Think of the most awkward or dreadful thing you could possibly do in any given situation and be almost compelled to do it but then realising that you could never show your face anywhere ever again if you did.

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Click an invisible pen I think is in my hand but is not constantly everyday.

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Tell myself that I'm only going for a 20 minute nap and end up sleeping for 1/+ hour(s)...

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eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

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only read the short jokes on this website

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Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

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I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

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Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

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Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

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Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

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Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

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Start to cry when your alone, but stop yourself because you don't want to look like a pussy.

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I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

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If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.

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right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...

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whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

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I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.