I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

everytime i see a jet stream in the air i pretend that i can shoot a missile with my finger tip that is self guided and tracks down the airplane that made that certain jet stream.

I lift my butt when I'm farting

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

getting really nervous about random white vans that drive by you.

Read the time on your watch, then after a few minutes, read it again because you forgot it.

Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Sometimes I wonder how food tastes when not drowned in ketchup.

Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

Sorry I posted last comment 3 times. And it is best ever not beat ever.

Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

The older I get the more honest I get

Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.