I got 12 months free xbox live gold from this website http://freexboxlivegoldcodes.org .You can also get it.

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When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

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think up the funniest jokes right before i go to sleep and cant think of them the next day

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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I make weird crazy faces at myself in the mirror whenever I leave the bathroom.

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while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

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I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

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I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

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I sometimes deliberately miss buses or trains even though I could easily board them.

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when you're walking down the streets and you listen to your iPod, you pretend you're part of the music video for that song and when no ones looking, lip sync to the lyrics, as if the camera man's filming you >.

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Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

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Write something down here so that it seems like you think its normal when your actually really paranoid that its not.

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skipping back to the start of the guitar solo over and over so I can pretend I'm playing it

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Analyzing what could be wrong or false about your religion and God, then shooing the thoughts away in fear you won't get into Heaven.

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Feeling sorry for objects to throw away!! Haha anyone els?

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When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

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right click refresh on desktop. Repeat

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after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

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Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

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I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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When you need something from someone and you forget what it's called,So then you have to awkwardly explain it.

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.