That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

Whenever i do something bad to someone I can't stop smiling even though i never wanted to smile in the first place and i feel like people think I'm a terrible person

turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

Listening to a song, thinking about having the life of the singer in the band

Half of these posts are all but "things you think only you do". So is mine

Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

Listening to romantic hollywood sad core and feeling depressed because your single.

Whenever I watch TV, the volume has to be on multiples of 5. Even if the perfect volume is in between.

I spin around in a spot, and then close my eyes and tilt my head up and to the opposite side i'm spinning to. It just feels awesome and it's even better while listening to music.

Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

Feels my beard with my tongue.

Feel the bed gets more comfortable the longer you put off getting into bed.

For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

Find that the kettle has recently been used and still contains hot water so decide to have a cup of tea just so that boiling that water wasn't a waste. Think that it might have cooled down by now. Reboil the water.

Play with my own boobs for no reason

At any time of day, when i'm not busy, someone you know pops into your head and you start talking to them telepathically, but not for long, then you realise that youre just plain crazy? anyone?

I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.