Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

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Read the time on your watch, then after a few minutes, read it again because you forgot it.

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

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I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

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Always have your feet under the cover, and if not, you think that something will get you.

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Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

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Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

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get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

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At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

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turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

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I mean Diana Ross.

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Listening to a song, thinking about having the life of the singer in the band

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When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

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wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

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Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

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I always try to play it cool and act like it’s no big deal. But I always have a mini anxiety attack before actually stepping onto a moving escalator. It is a task trying to time my step perfectly where my foot isn’t hanging off a step and I have to hurry my second foot on there isn’t an awdward space of steps between my feet. -Ikka

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When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

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Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

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Sleep in your jeans because you think it feels comfortable in the morning.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.