go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

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I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

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Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

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LOG OFF OF ICHAT BECAUSE THE PERSON U WERE JUST TALKING TO WENT OFFLINE.

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think up the funniest jokes right before i go to sleep and cant think of them the next day

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Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

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standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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Having the tv on always, just for background noise. Doesn't work with a computer/laptop, must be the tv.

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I don't like being told what I will do or how I will feel.

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Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

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Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

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When no one is home, I poop with the door open, just because I can.

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i feel all weird and sad when i thing about my old belongings.

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

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after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

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When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

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When I was a kid and I misbehaved when my dad used to smack me I would put emphasis in my cries to let him think that I got the lesson.

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I can only play a piano with my right hand

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I used to eat bath bubbles

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.