Run faster down hotel corridors.

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When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

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Chew as quietly as possible when eating cookies but as loud as possible when eating fruit.

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I have the background on my computer a picture of some cartoon characters,and when I'm alone I talk to the screen like those characters are actually in the room. -Briarwoodninja

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That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

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Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

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Hate people who don't dress like you because they're not fashionable. Hate people who do dress like you because they threaten your individuality.

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turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

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When I use the bathroom at school, I keep the door open with the kickstand and use the stall. It's because I fear that one day, when I'm all alone in the bathroom with the door closed, the fire alarm will go off and scare the living crap out of me. This trick backfires when someone comes in without closing the door and uses the urinal.

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When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

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Sometimes, for no real reason, I'll make strange or funny noises when no one is around.

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after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

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Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

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I can only play a piano with my right hand

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I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

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humiliating little girls

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Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

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I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

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Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

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For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

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If i read or see something good (on tv )the next time i daydream i am always some how involved in it

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Feel the bed gets more comfortable the longer you put off getting into bed.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.