Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...

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jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

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Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

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Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

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Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

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Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

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Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

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OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

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Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

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Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

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Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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Never step on manholes, because I'm afraid to fall in.

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Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment

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Chew as quietly as possible when eating cookies but as loud as possible when eating fruit.

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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When reading some of the weirder things here, I somewhat worry some of these things people do might start happening to me just because I read about them.

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When you cringe as you walk out of a store because you're paranoid the door will beep...

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Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.