At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

Try stick to something but fail in the end

when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

When I was a kid and I misbehaved when my dad used to smack me I would put emphasis in my cries to let him think that I got the lesson.

humiliating little girls

I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

Whenever you make cereal, you eat exactly where you make it like on the table.

Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

Smoking in the shower.

try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

Kill Jb without getting aressted.

Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

Left alone Big noise, people aren't expected back as soon so grab baseball bat and charge only to find them back early...."what you doing?" "batting my socks around practising my baseball skills"

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.