when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

Lightly touching your stomach or other body parts with your fingers to get that tickling sensation.

Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

I always walk down the hall James Bond style. Gun out, along the wall, looking around corners before I walk into or by a room.

Chew as quietly as possible when eating cookies but as loud as possible when eating fruit.

I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

When reading some of the weirder things here, I somewhat worry some of these things people do might start happening to me just because I read about them.

Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

I pretend I'm a really popular YouTuber and talk to nobody thinking they're my subscribers.

Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.