Sometimes I would just be thinking to myself and then think of something funny and laugh but I don't share it with anyone else makes me look insane.

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send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

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Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

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Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

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I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

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Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

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You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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Run faster down hotel corridors.

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skipping back to the start of the guitar solo over and over so I can pretend I'm playing it

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Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

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That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

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Drink out the carton (your whole family prob does it)

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TV turned on just so... Makes you not feeling alone or because some other unknown (or) irrational reason.And of course, feeling guilty cause you spending energy and money but still... Most of the time you just don't care.

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When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

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after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

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When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

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When you need something from someone and you forget what it's called,So then you have to awkwardly explain it.

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.