Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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Thinking something embarrassing, then having to talk to someone and suddenly getting worried you are about to blurt out your thoughts

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Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

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Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

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Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

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getting really nervous about random white vans that drive by you.

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All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

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I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

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If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

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Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.

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after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

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humiliating little girls

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Count how many steps there are in a stairwell I use often and then try to take it by same number each time... Eg if there are 16 then always go by twos and missing the others!?!?!?

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If i read or see something good (on tv )the next time i daydream i am always some how involved in it

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Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

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I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

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Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

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Think something you shouldn't about someone, stop thinking about it in case they read your mind, and then, as an added precaution, think "I know you listening".

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Analyzing what could be wrong or false about your religion and God, then shooing the thoughts away in fear you won't get into Heaven.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.