When I wake up after having a good dream I try to remember it but I don't

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Whenever you make cereal, you eat exactly where you make it like on the table.

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The only time I seem to look at the clock is when the numbers read my birth date.

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Be a loner at school

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Feel like something is behind you/watching you, run to your room super quickly and get into the room before that something gets you

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My daily agenda: wake up take a crap get out of bed...

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I have walked into a sliding glass door

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I hate being called "buddy".

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It's hot but I still have on covers

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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When I used to go on car rides at night I would look up at the moon and I would think it was following us.

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Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

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strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

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I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)

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When you need something from someone and you forget what it's called,So then you have to awkwardly explain it.

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I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

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taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

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Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

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Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

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When I'm home alone at night I check around the corners to make sure there isn't anyone there

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Check the lint filter on the dryer every time I walk into the laundry room.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.