Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

Read the time on your watch, then after a few minutes, read it again because you forgot it.

expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

Always have your feet under the cover, and if not, you think that something will get you.

Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

I mean Diana Ross.

Listening to a song, thinking about having the life of the singer in the band

When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

I always try to play it cool and act like it’s no big deal. But I always have a mini anxiety attack before actually stepping onto a moving escalator. It is a task trying to time my step perfectly where my foot isn’t hanging off a step and I have to hurry my second foot on there isn’t an awdward space of steps between my feet. -Ikka

When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

Sleep in your jeans because you think it feels comfortable in the morning.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.