like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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I pretend I'm a really popular YouTuber and talk to nobody thinking they're my subscribers.

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I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

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acting as if you can shoot with a banana

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Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

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Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

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You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

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I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

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blink

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eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

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Turn shower water all the way up hot before getting out because it feels good

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in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

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have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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I was not born in the country I am living in now

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When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

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When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

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I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <<

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Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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Refreshing captcha codes for five minutes straight until you find reasonably legible letters.

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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try to only take one step on each sidewalk square.

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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When two people in my house are arguing, I stay in my room to avoid awkwardly interrupting them and being dragged into it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.