Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

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I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

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after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

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Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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Try to time the traffic light so that when I snap, my light turns green. Always so so close.

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I see something glittery, someone tells me not to pick it up because I'll glitter all over myself, I pick it up anyway and glitter all over myself.

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Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

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humiliating little girls

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Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

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When I meet someone random, and have a small conversation, and then when they leave, I feel sad because I think I am never going to see them again.

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When two people in my house are arguing, I stay in my room to avoid awkwardly interrupting them and being dragged into it.

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At any time of day, when i'm not busy, someone you know pops into your head and you start talking to them telepathically, but not for long, then you realise that youre just plain crazy? anyone?

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I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

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Leftovers are better than the actual meal ;)

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Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

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Sometimes cringe at the sound when other people scratch themselves

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

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I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

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walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.