Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

When you start wondering if you're in a dream and suddenly feel trapped

Imagine flying things and epic battles when listening to music.

Dutch oven myself when I'm lying in bed trying to sleep

Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

Whenever I go to close the door to my room, I give the wall opposite me a hard, intimidating stare just in case an invisible person was watching me.

Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

if your listening to music, move the volume up and down to experience the bass a lil better

when i watch a movie, and a character in it gos underwater, i hold my breath with that person until that person gets above water, then i let go, either that, after the character comes up from the water, i still hold my breath until i cant take it anymore.

Accidentally scratching a surface and then scratching it again with the tops of your fingernails to even it out.

Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

Justin Beiber is a woman

I spin around in a spot, and then close my eyes and tilt my head up and to the opposite side i'm spinning to. It just feels awesome and it's even better while listening to music.

Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

When I find a new song I like, I listen to it over and over and over; >>Until I run that sh*t into the ground.

I talk to inanimate objects daily.

Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

I lift my butt when I'm farting

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.