What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

thumb_up thumb_down -72

IM 13 years old when i touch something i have a feeling and wont let me do anything until i touch it again or 4 times or sometimes even 16 times i cant live like this its weird!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -72

I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

thumb_up thumb_down -74

When someone enters the room while i'm playing a game, start playing the best song of the game soundtrack so they notice it and think the game has a cool soundtrack.

thumb_up thumb_down -78

scratch that bit between my balls and arse when it gets itchy, then carry on scratching for ages cos it feels so damn good

thumb_up thumb_down -90

Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

thumb_up thumb_down -102

Pretend my ski pole is a gun while I'm on the chair lift. Or just any object around when I'm not skiing.

thumb_up thumb_down -124

I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -130

When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Tells a joke only you thought was funny and still laughs then laughs harder because your the only one laughing nikki

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Only one tissue left in the box... I'll just use toilet paper.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Half of these posts are all but "things you think only you do". So is mine

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Think that some minutes feel shorter than others

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I scratch and sniff.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

right click refresh on desktop. Repeat

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.