when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

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Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

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Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

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I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

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When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

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Sometimes I wonder how food tastes when not drowned in ketchup.

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make south park refferences every day

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I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

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Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

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Tap my fingers really rapidly when I'm annoyed, stressed out, fed up or angry.

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Whenever Terminator 2 is on tv, I become enthralled and can't stop watching even though I've seen it a million times.

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I **** with no hands.

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Wait until my friends are done eating lunch so I don't have to dump my tray alone.

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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Start to cry when your alone, but stop yourself because you don't want to look like a pussy.

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Put my hands together the 'other' way

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The older I get the more honest I get

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Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

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When you like your own comment or status', but then you feel kind of pathetic for doing it so you unlike it.

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

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accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

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sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.