Deside to watch a video in bed on your phone or iPad and drop it on your face...

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when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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Sitting down in the shower

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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try to give your friends spirit animals

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I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

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So has anyone else ever been in the middle of doing something and at the exact moment something happens and you sort of wonder if it happened because of what you did.

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Reading your facebook posts that you wrote a year ago or more, and think of how stupid you were at that time.

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When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

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i see things on this site and am secretly glad im not weird like everyone else

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I blow my nose in my towel after i dry off. Then use the same towel the next day. lol

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I **** with no hands.

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

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Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

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I like to watch lava lamps heat up

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Pretend my ski pole is a gun while I'm on the chair lift. Or just any object around when I'm not skiing.

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Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

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Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

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make it a point of interest to know every word to a song that nobody likes. (i.e. call me maybe) >.>

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.