sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

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Take pieces of loose hair and keep it in a plastic bag in my wallet so if I ever get killed and my ID stolen, my body can still be identified.

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Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

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Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

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HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *end of special message just for you*

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try to give your friends spirit animals

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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I prefer to go to the bathroom with the door open.

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When I'm watching something interesting on TV, sometimes i realize they I'm making a weird face so i make sure that i make my face go back to its normal position. This way, my face won't get stuck like that

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Know almost every line from spongbob episodes.

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when walking i always count how many steps i have taken as i go

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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that time where you open the fridge door and stare at it for like 10 min then close it and walk away?

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stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

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don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

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Doing a little dance after having sex because your so proud you're a FATHER!!! - Uncle Jerrett

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Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

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I have a phobia of incest

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I like to watch lava lamps heat up

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Sometimes when someone says something to me, I will hear them perfectly clear, but I will instinctively say "what?"

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I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

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When you like your own comment or status', but then you feel kind of pathetic for doing it so you unlike it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.