- Things You Think Only You Do

Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

Whenever someone enters a pin number I always try to see how many number I can remember

Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

Wake up after a dream. About a day later you think about if it was real or not.

taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

Mares really turn me on, so I download "bad stuff" Ironically though, I worked at a farm last summer and realized there is nothing more disgusting than reality. Still mares turn me on... If on video.

I wonder if elections are rigged?

When I wake up after having a good dream I try to remember it but I don't

I don't use my car air conditioning because I think it's wasteful and it might "run-out" when I'm REALLY, REALLY hot.

Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

When I look at a clear blue sky, I'm convinced that I see little tiny floaty things, and think that I'm seeing air molecules.

When I meet someone random, and have a small conversation, and then when they leave, I feel sad because I think I am never going to see them again.

When I haven't looked in a mirror for a while, I worry that I look awful, and when I get to a mirror, I'm like "Oh yeah, that's what I look like".

Everytime my sibling starts a sentance with "I remember when","I have an idea"etc.,I get up and walk out.

The volume level on my TV has to be either an even number or a multiple of five.

Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

When in a public toilet, I never leave the cubicle until everyone is either out of the room or in their own cubicle.

Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

I flush the toilet if the water's green and I'm going to have a poo, so it doesn't splash me.

the power to regenerate your appendix

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.