Mayada stupid

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I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

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Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

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i feel all weird and sad when i thing about my old belongings.

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Seeing an acquaintance who you would feel awkward talking to in a public place, knowing they see you as well, and pretending not to see them, while hoping they pretend not to see you as well.

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I wonder what a baby is laughing about when they are apparently being entertained by something in the room I can't see

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Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

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Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

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Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

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I take a dump and then look to see how big it is.

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When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

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sometimes when im in the shower and i hear the slightest bump i look behind the curtains to see if anyone is about to scare me

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When two people in my house are arguing, I stay in my room to avoid awkwardly interrupting them and being dragged into it.

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When playing a game you refer to the kid you don't know as "kid" - ar2

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wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

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Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

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Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

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Emmy Jackson Y U ALWAYS ANGRY WHEN SOMEONE SAY HI

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When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

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I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.