- Things You Think Only You Do

When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.