try to give your friends spirit animals

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

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I blow my nose in my towel after i dry off. Then use the same towel the next day. lol

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After getting up from the grass, I use my foot to move the grass I was sitting on around so that there isn't a butt print in the grass.

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Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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when listening to pandora just skip through the songs and hit the like or hate buttons and not listen to the music,but then when you want to listen to the music you can't because theres no wifi

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I like to watch lava lamps heat up

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Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

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Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

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After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

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make it a point of interest to know every word to a song that nobody likes. (i.e. call me maybe) >.>

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When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

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That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

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Feeling sorry for objects to throw away!! Haha anyone els?

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When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

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You look over the edge of a tall building/structure, and have that sudden urge to jump off.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.