Only one tissue left in the box... I'll just use toilet paper.

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When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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Mayada stupid

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

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i feel all weird and sad when i thing about my old belongings.

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When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

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Save more than once on your favourite game.

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

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I have a band in my head that performs for me every time I listen to music.

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I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

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I take a dump and then look to see how big it is.

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When playing a game you refer to the kid you don't know as "kid" - ar2

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

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Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

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Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

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When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

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Emmy Jackson Y U ALWAYS ANGRY WHEN SOMEONE SAY HI

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Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

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I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.