All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

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Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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When you don't have enough money for something, you just take a tiny bit of money from your siblings and parents room at a time so they don't notice any different

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Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

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I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

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I have a phobia of incest

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Make up a song to yourself.

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Go for a 10 mile run.

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Lightly touching your stomach or other body parts with your fingers to get that tickling sensation.

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When you lie in bed and imagine scenarios that will never happen.

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I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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Watch a familiar movie, and then freak out when you see a suspensful part, only to later realize that there was no point in getting worked up since you already know what happens.

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When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

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Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

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Save more than once on your favourite game.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.