I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

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i see things on this site and am secretly glad im not weird like everyone else

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Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

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Tap my fingers really rapidly when I'm annoyed, stressed out, fed up or angry.

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

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click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

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Never step on manholes, because I'm afraid to fall in.

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Start to cry when your alone, but stop yourself because you don't want to look like a pussy.

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

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Run faster down hotel corridors.

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masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

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Analyzing what could be wrong or false about your religion and God, then shooing the thoughts away in fear you won't get into Heaven.

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Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

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That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

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Leave the fan on at night just in case you feel to warm.

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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Think that the person driving keeps staring at me when ever they look in the mirror and I'm sat in the back.

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

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Seeing an acquaintance who you would feel awkward talking to in a public place, knowing they see you as well, and pretending not to see them, while hoping they pretend not to see you as well.

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Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.