use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

i masturbate with my feet

Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

When I'm watching something interesting on TV, sometimes i realize they I'm making a weird face so i make sure that i make my face go back to its normal position. This way, my face won't get stuck like that

When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

try to give your friends spirit animals

Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

When you like your own comment or status', but then you feel kind of pathetic for doing it so you unlike it.

masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.