Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

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get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

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I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)

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it is not disgusting to bite your toe nails, it is a skill

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You think about all the stupid things you did in elementary school and avoid anyone who went to your elementary school in high school.

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When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

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When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

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When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

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When im alone in my car i talk to myself about lifes issues

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I wonder what a baby is laughing about when they are apparently being entertained by something in the room I can't see

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I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

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Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

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Tear up when I poop

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Can't stop tears from comeing to your eyes when singing

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when I go shopping I go in the store, get what I need and then I leave I don't browse.

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When peeing at a urinal, move my stream back and forth the coat as much of the wall as I can.

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Imagining how it would feel to switch bodies with your crush

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Playing hide-and-seek and finding the best spot ever, only to realize you have to pee

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make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.