Hthe temptation to go up on the roof but when u get to where u go out get freaked and run away

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I take a dump and then look to see how big it is.

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When I'm in the car I imagine I'm Superman flying along next to the car, whipping under, over and around traffic signs, trees, and fences. Sometimes I then fly up above the traffic a little. Then I get worried I will cause a traffic accident because people will be watching me instead of the road. I've done this since I was a kid. I'm 45 now and I still do it! Sometimes I'm Spider-Man, swing and jumping from truck to truck, car to car to keep moving fast along the highway. And lately, sometimes I do the Superman flying thing, but as Iron Man.

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Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

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If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

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You always go to the corner of the shower when the cold water is running.

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Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

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play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

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when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.

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Playing hide-and-seek and finding the best spot ever, only to realize you have to pee

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Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

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When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

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I get more creeped out the more I read the comments here, especially as the comments start getting really low thumbs ups.

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Mares really turn me on, so I download "bad stuff" Ironically though, I worked at a farm last summer and realized there is nothing more disgusting than reality. Still mares turn me on... If on video.

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When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

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We keep a spare key hidden outside somewhere in case we are locked out

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When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.

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I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

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When I meet someone random, and have a small conversation, and then when they leave, I feel sad because I think I am never going to see them again.

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Think of the most awkward or dreadful thing you could possibly do in any given situation and be almost compelled to do it but then realising that you could never show your face anywhere ever again if you did.

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Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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I don't read the terms of service.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.