Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

i masturbate with my feet

Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

i see things on this site and am secretly glad im not weird like everyone else

When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

I blow my nose in my towel after i dry off. Then use the same towel the next day. lol

Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

Imagine a little person trapped and about to be crushed in the progress bar.

Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

Watch a familiar movie, and then freak out when you see a suspensful part, only to later realize that there was no point in getting worked up since you already know what happens.

While I Am on the computer late at night, my Mum tells me to go to bed, I say I will in a second. I stay for a few more minutes, my mum tells me again, I do the same thing...

When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

Think that some minutes feel shorter than others

Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.