I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

I lift my butt when I'm farting

Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

trying to piss after masturbation hurts.

No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

getting really nervous about random white vans that drive by you.

Sitting down in the shower

Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

Being fat

try to give your friends spirit animals

Watched the woman in black then go to bed then suddenly a woman in black comes in my room oh wait it is just my mum saying good night

Sometimes at night, I find myself imagining people I know saying my name, trying to get my attention in my head. They won't stop until I respond out loud.

Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.