brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

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Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

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When i talk i say i like how or i hate that.

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right click refresh on desktop. Repeat

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I watch American football with the sound down low because the announcers are always trying to tell us that we didn't see what we just saw when the referees make bad calls

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wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

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Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

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when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.

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Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

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Without thinking i ask questions i know the answer to

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Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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When peeing at a urinal, move my stream back and forth the coat as much of the wall as I can.

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Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

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after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

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Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

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When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

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When two people in my house are arguing, I stay in my room to avoid awkwardly interrupting them and being dragged into it.

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like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

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I always try to play it cool and act like it’s no big deal. But I always have a mini anxiety attack before actually stepping onto a moving escalator. It is a task trying to time my step perfectly where my foot isn’t hanging off a step and I have to hurry my second foot on there isn’t an awdward space of steps between my feet. -Ikka

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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I hold my breath in elevators

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I refuse to take dump with the shower curtain closed. I know someone's behind it...

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Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.