- Things You Think Only You Do

When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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freak out if poster or pictures eyes are looking at me and can't have pictures in my room of famous people, however if I'm out and scared i have to have the pictures on my phone look at me for safety.....really wondering if any one else has this

Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

Playing hide-and-seek and finding the best spot ever, only to realize you have to pee

Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

Without thinking i ask questions i know the answer to

When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

Right before I go to the dentist I brush my teeth.

I always have to remake my bed right before going to sleep in it

I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

Find myself thinking a completely random meaningless sentence as I'm falling asleep with no idea how I got to that thought.

I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

acting as if you can shoot with a banana

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.