Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

If i read or see something good (on tv )the next time i daydream i am always some how involved in it

Sometimes I find myself staring at the television only to realize its off.

Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

Stop at the beginning of an escalator, and let the stairs drag you forward by just your toes.

Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

I pretend that my pillow is the love of my life and kiss it and cuddle it before bed.

Smoking in the shower.

Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

not eating the ends of a hotdog.

When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

I lift my butt when I'm farting

Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.