Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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when i have a head or toothache...i hit it harder thinking it will stop or get better

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When I drink out of a disposable coffee cup with a lid, the opening on the lid has be on the exact opposite side from the seam where the cup is glued to form the cylinder.

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When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

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When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

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Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

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Without thinking i ask questions i know the answer to

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get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

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When there are multiple puddles on the sidewalk you try and jump in every single one of them

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When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

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I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

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Sometimes I reflect on my life and just feel humiliated.

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Mouth words to people wearing headphones to try and get them to take them off.

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When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

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When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

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When I'm home alone at night I check around the corners to make sure there isn't anyone there

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I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

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the power to regenerate your appendix

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I don't read the terms of service.

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turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

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eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

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Thinking something embarrassing, then having to talk to someone and suddenly getting worried you are about to blurt out your thoughts

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Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.