- Things You Think Only You Do

Pick your butt and then wipe your hand/fingers somewhere hoping that the smell dosn't stick to you and that no one smells it....

Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

Something that bothers me is when a movie sequel comes out and for whatever reason the same things from the first movie happens so they just end up making the same movie

OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

Picking my nose.

send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

Reading your facebook posts that you wrote a year ago or more, and think of how stupid you were at that time.

i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

Everytime aplane is flying low you think it's going to crash right in front of your eyes

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

I can't piss with my shoes on.

I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

I sometimes deliberately miss buses or trains even though I could easily board them.

when im lying in bed and fart i bring the blanket up to my nose and smell it. And nod in approval..

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.