Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

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Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

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When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

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For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

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Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

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That feeling you get where you slip on something but you save yourself just in time and your just like "holy crap, i almost cracked my head and died," then two minutes later your legs are still shaking

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While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

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When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

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When I'm watching a video on YouTube, I repeatedly click on the video slider section below the video because I feel uncomfortable not doing it, ever since I realized that you can't move to different parts of the video with your keyboard without clicking there first.

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Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

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If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

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I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

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Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

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trying to piss after masturbation hurts.

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fap

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send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

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Take pieces of loose hair and keep it in a plastic bag in my wallet so if I ever get killed and my ID stolen, my body can still be identified.

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Watched the woman in black then go to bed then suddenly a woman in black comes in my room oh wait it is just my mum saying good night

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Know almost every line from spongbob episodes.

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Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

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Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

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when walking i always count how many steps i have taken as i go

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.