Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

Embarassingly repeatedly use of the word "bro" when irritated or excited.

Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

While in bed, I cover my head with my bed sheets because it makes me feel safe from monsters.

acting as if you can shoot with a banana

Get extremly pissed off when everyone on youtube thinks that only guys use the website and call you "dude" , "bro" or "sir" when they respond to a comment you posted -_-

Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

i masturbate with my feet

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

After getting up from the grass, I use my foot to move the grass I was sitting on around so that there isn't a butt print in the grass.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.