Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

thumb_up thumb_down -48

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Whenever I finish reading a book, I feel a great sense of achievement.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

everytime i see a jet stream in the air i pretend that i can shoot a missile with my finger tip that is self guided and tracks down the airplane that made that certain jet stream.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

thumb_up thumb_down -56

I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

thumb_up thumb_down -56

I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

thumb_up thumb_down -58

after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Being fat

thumb_up thumb_down -62

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

Reading your facebook posts that you wrote a year ago or more, and think of how stupid you were at that time.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

I Never read the Terms of Service but click the box anyway .

thumb_up thumb_down -74

....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

thumb_up thumb_down -84

When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -86

scratch that bit between my balls and arse when it gets itchy, then carry on scratching for ages cos it feels so damn good

thumb_up thumb_down -88

I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -130

make it a point of interest to know every word to a song that nobody likes. (i.e. call me maybe) >.>

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Pretend I'm a back-up dancer or singing a duet with the singer of the song I'm listening to.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.