I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

When I'm watching a video on YouTube, I repeatedly click on the video slider section below the video because I feel uncomfortable not doing it, ever since I realized that you can't move to different parts of the video with your keyboard without clicking there first.

Going to sleep during class thinking that you've written down all your notes, until you wake up and realize you did nothing.

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

I think Frozen is an overrated film

Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

Something that bothers me is when a movie sequel comes out and for whatever reason the same things from the first movie happens so they just end up making the same movie

Wonder if the life your living is one long dream and your gonna wake up and be some type of alien.

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

Only use the left earphone.

when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.