I refuse to take dump with the shower curtain closed. I know someone's behind it...

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

thumb_up thumb_down -41

If I see the same model of vehicle as mine in a parking lot, I get overly excited if I manage to get a parking spot next to it. Extra points for same color or type (i.e. quad cab vs regular cab).

thumb_up thumb_down -41

try to rip the top off an Oreo without messing up the cream and then if the cream comes out on both parts not wanting to eat the Oreo because its wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

thumb_up thumb_down -45

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

thumb_up thumb_down -47

I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

thumb_up thumb_down -49

When home alone and you hear a noise getting out a gun/weapon.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Remove all the stupid gobbldegook words that the captchas from this site add to my predictive text.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

thumb_up thumb_down -53

I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

thumb_up thumb_down -55

When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Pretending you're a badass character from an anime or movie when listening to rock music (or something similar)

thumb_up thumb_down -83

I chew around the center of carrots.

thumb_up thumb_down -87

When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

thumb_up thumb_down -89

You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

thumb_up thumb_down -89

....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

thumb_up thumb_down -93

When I was little I used to cover myself all the way up and put pillows around me, then ask my sister if she could see me, trying to be invisible when I sleep just in case someone breaks into my house at night.

thumb_up thumb_down -93

Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

thumb_up thumb_down -109

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.