Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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after seeing toy story, and watching that toys moved and talked to each other when the humans werent around, thinking that toys are really like that when you gone, and when you go back to you room, the toys rush back into their spots.

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RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

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Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

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I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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not eating the ends of a hotdog.

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I don't read the terms of service.

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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Pick your butt and then wipe your hand/fingers somewhere hoping that the smell dosn't stick to you and that no one smells it....

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Smoking in the shower.

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Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

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everytime i see a jet stream in the air i pretend that i can shoot a missile with my finger tip that is self guided and tracks down the airplane that made that certain jet stream.

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When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

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whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

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When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

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Sitting down in the shower

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I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

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When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

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k. everyone

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When you are thinking, and you think about what you are thinking. You are automatically purposely thinking until you stop thinking about it. I am thinking about thinking about how I think right now. I think...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.