Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

Whenever I get sweaty I put baby powder around my groin area and under arms. Ramos

I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

Think of the most awkward or dreadful thing you could possibly do in any given situation and be almost compelled to do it but then realising that you could never show your face anywhere ever again if you did.

Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

acting as if you can shoot with a banana

When I'm watching a video on YouTube, I repeatedly click on the video slider section below the video because I feel uncomfortable not doing it, ever since I realized that you can't move to different parts of the video with your keyboard without clicking there first.

Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

Smoking in the shower.

when passing someone in a car beside you, you try to wonder where they are going just by looking at them, their clothes or their expressions

When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

If I'm in the car looking for an address or a street name I'll turn down the radio. Why?

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

Having more dificulty thinking in your native language than your 2nd or 3rd one. Or 4th one. Or... the rest. I highly doubt that one's common.

Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

Only use the left earphone.

Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.