Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

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When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

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Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

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see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

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If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

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Laying alone in bed at night and then every single scary thought, face, image, movie, or whatever starts playing in your mind.

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If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

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Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

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Feel bad about hurting someone a long time ago, when I was a child, and wish I could speak to that person and say "I'm sorry." Cringe whenever the thought of the incident rises.

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feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

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Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

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when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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Anytime I walk in anyplace with cracks in the ground (tiled floors, cement squares, etc.) I do my best to avoid stepping on cracks in fear of something happening if I do.

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I wonder if sport games are rigged?

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Having the TV turned on when using my laptop or else the silence will make me feel like someone is in my house trying to kill me.

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When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

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when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

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Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

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Drink out the carton (your whole family prob does it)

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Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

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When I am making submissions to this site I sometimes accidentally put them in the comment section

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.