When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

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When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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Whenever I hear someone say a word in a way that I like, I repeat it.

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I push the door open with my stomach

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Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

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Imagining how it would feel to switch bodies with your crush

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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when I go shopping I go in the store, get what I need and then I leave I don't browse.

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Imagine flying things and epic battles when listening to music.

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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Make odd grunting noises and sighs of relief while going #2.

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

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check shower for murder then pee

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I read the down voted posts

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When I wake up after having a good dream I try to remember it but I don't

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when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

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Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

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I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

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When I'm watching a video on YouTube, I repeatedly click on the video slider section below the video because I feel uncomfortable not doing it, ever since I realized that you can't move to different parts of the video with your keyboard without clicking there first.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.