When I'm home alone at night I check around the corners to make sure there isn't anyone there

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I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

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I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

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Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

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walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

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in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

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test how many stares you can scale in one step

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Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

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I got 12 months free xbox live gold from this website http://freexboxlivegoldcodes.org .You can also get it.

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Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

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When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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Read the time on your watch, then after a few minutes, read it again because you forgot it.

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Only use the left earphone.

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I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

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OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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getting really nervous about random white vans that drive by you.

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Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

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Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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Hate when I can't sleep and the sun starts to come up and I hear birds chirping and i get worried and just realize that I should be happy that it's a new day and to relax.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.