- Things You Think Only You Do

When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

Drink alcohol out of styrofoam soda cups on the bus and train.

Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

Stop at the beginning of an escalator, and let the stairs drag you forward by just your toes.

I don't read the terms of service.

in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

At any time of day, when i'm not busy, someone you know pops into your head and you start talking to them telepathically, but not for long, then you realise that youre just plain crazy? anyone?

I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

I have won so many competitions online for things like being the 99, 999th visitor on the site

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

sometimes sigh sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

look at bins as i walk past them

Sitting down in the shower

Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.