- Things You Think Only You Do

When I'm in the car I imagine I'm Superman flying along next to the car, whipping under, over and around traffic signs, trees, and fences. Sometimes I then fly up above the traffic a little. Then I get worried I will cause a traffic accident because people will be watching me instead of the road. I've done this since I was a kid. I'm 45 now and I still do it! Sometimes I'm Spider-Man, swing and jumping from truck to truck, car to car to keep moving fast along the highway. And lately, sometimes I do the Superman flying thing, but as Iron Man.

fart then blame it on the guy next to me realizing theres no one near me and everyone looks at me....awkward

When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

in burgers, you eat until you have only a few bites left, then you eat the bun and then the insides

Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

my favorite singer is Bles Bridges 22/07/1947-24/03/2000

When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

When in shower, I turn the heat to max for a few minutes to warm up the whole bathroom.

When I'm alone with my pet, sometimes we just sit down and stare at each each other for a minute or two

When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

Log onto facebook, notice a family member is also logged on, and immediately log off before they trap you in a never-ending facebook chat.

when i watch a movie, and a character in it gos underwater, i hold my breath with that person until that person gets above water, then i let go, either that, after the character comes up from the water, i still hold my breath until i cant take it anymore.

That feeling you get where you slip on something but you save yourself just in time and your just like "holy crap, i almost cracked my head and died," then two minutes later your legs are still shaking

Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

having cool friends, but all their other friends are nerds.

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

I read the down voted posts

When I meet someone random, and have a small conversation, and then when they leave, I feel sad because I think I am never going to see them again.

Feel like something is behind you/watching you, run to your room super quickly and get into the room before that something gets you

Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.