I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

thumb_up thumb_down -66

Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

thumb_up thumb_down -72

Everytime aplane is flying low you think it's going to crash right in front of your eyes

thumb_up thumb_down -74

I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

thumb_up thumb_down -78

After getting up from the grass, I use my foot to move the grass I was sitting on around so that there isn't a butt print in the grass.

thumb_up thumb_down -86

Imagine a little person trapped and about to be crushed in the progress bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -94

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

thumb_up thumb_down -126

check to see if post has any likes right after posting it. then have second thoughts about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

I always walk down the hall James Bond style. Gun out, along the wall, looking around corners before I walk into or by a room.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

looking at the last page of thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com to see how weird some people are...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

thumb_up thumb_down +17

I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Watch a familiar movie, and then freak out when you see a suspensful part, only to later realize that there was no point in getting worked up since you already know what happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

think of who i would kill if i found out i only had a few weeks to live. i.e. sickest criminal alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I pee in the shower. :3

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Do somthing only you do

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.