When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

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judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

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Click an invisible pen I think is in my hand but is not constantly everyday.

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Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

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When having a flog in the shower I keep checking the door to make sure noone walks in

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Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

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If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

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Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

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walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

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Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

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I don't read the terms of service.

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I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

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Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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You take showers on school morning because you like to stand there under the hot water just thinking about life while your warm

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Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

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Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

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When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

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Having more dificulty thinking in your native language than your 2nd or 3rd one. Or 4th one. Or... the rest. I highly doubt that one's common.

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When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.