When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

Click an invisible pen I think is in my hand but is not constantly everyday.

Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

When having a flog in the shower I keep checking the door to make sure noone walks in

Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

I don't read the terms of service.

I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

You take showers on school morning because you like to stand there under the hot water just thinking about life while your warm

Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

Having more dificulty thinking in your native language than your 2nd or 3rd one. Or 4th one. Or... the rest. I highly doubt that one's common.

When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.