Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

thumb_up thumb_down -17

only read the short jokes on this website

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Get extremly pissed off when everyone on youtube thinks that only guys use the website and call you "dude" , "bro" or "sir" when they respond to a comment you posted -_-

thumb_up thumb_down -35

sitting in the passenger seat of the car, move my head around gently to guide a piece of dirt on the window in the foreground around the obstacle course of trees, streetlights etc in the background. Also, imagine my eyes are projecting lasers which cut through anything and carve the passing world up to my design.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Going to sleep during class thinking that you've written down all your notes, until you wake up and realize you did nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

thumb_up thumb_down -45

When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

thumb_up thumb_down -51

I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

thumb_up thumb_down -61

sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

thumb_up thumb_down -63

I have autofocus in my eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

When I was little I used to cover myself all the way up and put pillows around me, then ask my sister if she could see me, trying to be invisible when I sleep just in case someone breaks into my house at night.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -73

When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

thumb_up thumb_down -97

When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

thumb_up thumb_down -107

If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

thumb_up thumb_down +92

Laying alone in bed at night and then every single scary thought, face, image, movie, or whatever starts playing in your mind.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.