(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

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Whenever I drop food on the floor I get my dog to come clean it for me

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I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

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think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

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get really paranoid when you're in a shop's changing room and try and make sure the curtain is fully closed so nobody can see in

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I really enjoy spending my birthday alone. I never told anyone that.

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I wonder what a baby is laughing about when they are apparently being entertained by something in the room I can't see

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When I can't find my phone so I panic and shearch everywhere only to find out it was in my pocket.

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Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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Whenever I watch TV, the volume has to be on multiples of 5. Even if the perfect volume is in between.

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I read the down voted posts

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Drink alcohol out of styrofoam soda cups on the bus and train.

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Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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Sit at your desk at work and think to yourself "is this it? I feel like I was meant for something bigger, like being an actor or a real life hero." then you look around you and feel bad because you feel like you dumped on everyone else who seem happy wih their lives. Then you go back to your boring desk job anyway.

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Stop at the beginning of an escalator, and let the stairs drag you forward by just your toes.

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When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

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My daily agenda: wake up take a crap get out of bed...

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I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.