Check the lint filter on the dryer every time I walk into the laundry room.

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I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

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Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

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start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

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Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

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Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

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Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

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Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

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Sorry I posted last comment 3 times. And it is best ever not beat ever.

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I can't piss with my shoes on.

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Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

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Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

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i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

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(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

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Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

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When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.

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When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.