Check the lint filter on the dryer every time I walk into the laundry room.

I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

Sorry I posted last comment 3 times. And it is best ever not beat ever.

I can't piss with my shoes on.

Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.

When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.