Before getting in the shower, staring at your naked body, thinking your sexy.

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Whenever you shave, you make sure you cut both ends of your moustache, leaving a small patch in the middle above your lips. Then you pretend to be Hitler ;)

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When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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Go to bed at 9 am and then regret whole day is wasted

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stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

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Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

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when i was i kid i use to do the balloon trick where you rubit on your head then when there is enough put it on a wooden floor and while it's followin me i put my hands out and pretended that i was controlling it

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Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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I like to go out without shoes on hot days and play the floor is lava

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When you like your own comment or status', but then you feel kind of pathetic for doing it so you unlike it.

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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When posting these, I'm rarely able to read the words/letters in the box that prove you're human and not some computer virus. Now I'm starting to think I'm not a human......

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Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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it is not disgusting to bite your toe nails, it is a skill

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try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

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sometimes i mouth improvised, ridiculous sentences in the mirror to see what i look like when i talk to people

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Wake up after a dream. About a day later you think about if it was real or not.

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Right before I go to the dentist I brush my teeth.

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.