Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

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Try to time the traffic light so that when I snap, my light turns green. Always so so close.

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while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

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Emmy Jackson Y U ALWAYS ANGRY WHEN SOMEONE SAY HI

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When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

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When I drink out of a disposable coffee cup with a lid, the opening on the lid has be on the exact opposite side from the seam where the cup is glued to form the cylinder.

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Eat the last bowl of ice cream. Then 6 hours later, you wish you hadn't. (sometimes even open the fridge and check whether you actually ate it or not)

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taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

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I refuse to take dump with the shower curtain closed. I know someone's behind it...

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i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

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Touch something dirty with one hand then wash it but then wash the other hand cause it feels weird when it's not wet like your other hand.

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If I see the same model of vehicle as mine in a parking lot, I get overly excited if I manage to get a parking spot next to it. Extra points for same color or type (i.e. quad cab vs regular cab).

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Bored. Open refrigerator. Nothing to eat. Open it again five minutes later.

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Fall down the stairs, bounce on your ass to the bottom, feel scared, then want to DO IT AGAIN! Get pwned at a game, rage, look at your cat sitting beside you, looking back, and say "What?"

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Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

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in a grocery store, only walking on the colored single tiles the entire time your in there pretending there small cliffs without touching the white one otherwise you fall and fail.

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Eating chicken at KFC.

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I pretend that my pillow is the love of my life and kiss it and cuddle it before bed.

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Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

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Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.