Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

While I Am on the computer late at night, my Mum tells me to go to bed, I say I will in a second. I stay for a few more minutes, my mum tells me again, I do the same thing...

You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

I worry because I keep wondering why I worry.

My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

When I am in class or somewhere boring I start getting thoughts of weird senerios like a group of zombies swamping the place or being hit by an earthquake etc and being one of the surivors. But then i realise that the possibility of that happening is incredibly slim and get depressed. Bananas!

In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

When reading a book where the main character has the same name as someone I know, I visualize that character in my head as that person.

When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

Get to lazy to stand up in the shower so I sit down in the shower

Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

Eating chicken at KFC.

I lift my butt when I'm farting

Thinking something embarrassing, then having to talk to someone and suddenly getting worried you are about to blurt out your thoughts

When on long car rides through the mountains of Cali, look at a fence and pretend its a roller coaster and talk like im on it with a friend. And when the fence ends,name and rate it like it was real -Nirp

I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.