having cool friends, but all their other friends are nerds.

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

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I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

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Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

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Play with my own boobs for no reason

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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Reading all these posts and being reminded that we are all more similar to each other than we think, regardless of whatever group each of us may belong to.

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Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

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call someone by a siblings name.

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Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

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Poo really loud

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Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

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If I'm in the car looking for an address or a street name I'll turn down the radio. Why?

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eating a sandwich with strategically placed bites such that i get the same ratio of crust to tastier non-crust sandwich center in each bite. sometimes i just take two smaller bites of crust and center part so that i don't have to taste mostly bread crust in a mouthful.

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Left alone Big noise, people aren't expected back as soon so grab baseball bat and charge only to find them back early...."what you doing?" "batting my socks around practising my baseball skills"

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Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

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Pretend animals talk to you!

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When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

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Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you

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I blow my nose in my towel after i dry off. Then use the same towel the next day. lol

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After getting up from the grass, I use my foot to move the grass I was sitting on around so that there isn't a butt print in the grass.

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when you're walking down the streets and you listen to your iPod, you pretend you're part of the music video for that song and when no ones looking, lip sync to the lyrics, as if the camera man's filming you >.

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Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.