Tear up when I poop

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Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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Keep things on my body equal. ex. Hold something in my right hand so I hold something equally heavy in my left hand.

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When I drink out of a disposable coffee cup with a lid, the opening on the lid has be on the exact opposite side from the seam where the cup is glued to form the cylinder.

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when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.

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When there are multiple puddles on the sidewalk you try and jump in every single one of them

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Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

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I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

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when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

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When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

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Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

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When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

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I read the down voted posts

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When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

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Right before I go to the dentist I brush my teeth.

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Picking your dogs booger for him/her

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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Eat the last bowl of ice cream. Then 6 hours later, you wish you hadn't. (sometimes even open the fridge and check whether you actually ate it or not)

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You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

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After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

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Videotape my mother in the shower.

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RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.