Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

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My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

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When I can't find my phone so I panic and shearch everywhere only to find out it was in my pocket.

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When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

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When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

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I never feel bored

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Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When receiving instructions from people one on one, whether it's a man or a woman, I wonder what they would do if I kissed them while they are talking.

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think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

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I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

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It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

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Feel the bed gets more comfortable the longer you put off getting into bed.

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

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feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

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After eating a sandwich, eat the leftover sesame seeds one-by-one.

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I never even met you! Why do you care who I'm talking to?

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I Think people can read my mind....."if you can read my mind nod your head or don't if you don't want me to know that you can" It doesn't work either way but yeah thats just me lol

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I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

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Everytime my sibling starts a sentance with "I remember when","I have an idea"etc.,I get up and walk out.

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blink

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trying to piss after masturbation hurts.

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Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.