I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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Comment on here and wait a few days and see if I got some likes . CMOOON , You do it .

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I Masturbate Daily.

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When bored you watch the minute hand on a clock and try to see if you can see it move

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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When I see someones comment has alot of dislikes , I add on to it .

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Go through a bunch of the boxes with the messed up letters (The ones making sure your not a robot) trying to find one you like. Then, click the refresh button and realize that the last one might have been the best one you were going to get.

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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When I listen to certain songs,it makes me feel awsome :D I listen to alot of LinkinPark -Briarwoodninja

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i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

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Sometimes I worry that my life is just someones dream and that I'm not real.

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I sit up all night on the computer/xbox then when people ask if i have slept i just lie and say yes to avoid the drama.

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When you're bored or alone, you think of an argument you had with a friend recently, then think of all the things you should've said and get all powered up inside, but then you realise it's too late -_-

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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Think something you shouldn't about someone, stop thinking about it in case they read your mind, and then, as an added precaution, think "I know you listening".

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A mix of Slenderman and Herobrine would be the ideal husband for me. >:)

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Feeling sorry for objects to throw away!! Haha anyone els?

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not be afraid of hurricane sandy

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Mayada stupid

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When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.