After waking up from being extremely intoxicated the night before, i check my phone and ALL my accounts on the internet to make sure i didnt make an ass of myself.

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I Think people can read my mind....."if you can read my mind nod your head or don't if you don't want me to know that you can" It doesn't work either way but yeah thats just me lol

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Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

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Turn shower water all the way up hot before getting out because it feels good

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See my "double reflection" in 2 mirrors and then get freaked out for a good ten minutes that my usual image of myself is actually the flipped version...

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test how many stares you can scale in one step

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I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

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I HATE minecraft gift codes and the morons who post about them. I wish those morons would get off my planet.

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Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

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Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

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rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

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All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

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When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

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Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

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Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

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Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

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I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

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I gotta get down of Friday

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Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

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Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you

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i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

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Always have your feet under the cover, and if not, you think that something will get you.

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Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

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Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.