When on long car rides through the mountains of Cali, look at a fence and pretend its a roller coaster and talk like im on it with a friend. And when the fence ends,name and rate it like it was real -Nirp

thumb_up thumb_down -38

I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

thumb_up thumb_down -40

I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Wonder if the life your living is one long dream and your gonna wake up and be some type of alien.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

When I see a 20th Century Fox movie, I always sing the intro.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Think that everything you do is life is being recorded by secret cameras and you're on a reality show. But you don't actually know. The Truman Show. -Robert

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Comment on here and wait a few days and see if I got some likes . CMOOON , You do it .

thumb_up thumb_down -56

poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

thumb_up thumb_down -56

HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *end of special message just for you*

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Before getting in the shower, staring at your naked body, thinking your sexy.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Likes that girggle sound you make after a burp.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

I look at this site and wonder if the thumbs up are all from people who actually do the same thing, or just people who like that or think it's a funny thing to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

thumb_up thumb_down -72

I gotta get down of Friday

thumb_up thumb_down -80

taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

thumb_up thumb_down -96

Legally changing your name to Peter Jankins just cuz

thumb_up thumb_down -146

Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.