When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

i put a empty pack of cigarettes under my pillow and hoped the cigarette fairy would come when i was asleep

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

Ur mum

When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

Whenever I finish reading a book, I feel a great sense of achievement.

You feel like someone can read your mind so you try not to think about stupid stuff.

Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.

I was not born in the country I am living in now

filling your mouth with water in the shower and spitting it at the wall.

Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you

I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.