Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

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When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

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Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

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Smoking in the shower.

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Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

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I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

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I think Frozen is an overrated film

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LOG OFF OF ICHAT BECAUSE THE PERSON U WERE JUST TALKING TO WENT OFFLINE.

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trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

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Stand on the first floor and look up through the 2nd story railing just to look up women's skirts.

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When you are thinking, and you think about what you are thinking. You are automatically purposely thinking until you stop thinking about it. I am thinking about thinking about how I think right now. I think...

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Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

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eating a sandwich with strategically placed bites such that i get the same ratio of crust to tastier non-crust sandwich center in each bite. sometimes i just take two smaller bites of crust and center part so that i don't have to taste mostly bread crust in a mouthful.

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So has anyone else ever been in the middle of doing something and at the exact moment something happens and you sort of wonder if it happened because of what you did.

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

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Stare at something long enough thinking it will eventually move.

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Know almost every line from spongbob episodes.

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I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

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I can't piss with my shoes on.

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try to give your friends spirit animals

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filling your mouth with water in the shower and spitting it at the wall.

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Tap my fingers really rapidly when I'm annoyed, stressed out, fed up or angry.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.