watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

When I wake up after having a good dream I try to remember it but I don't

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Picking your dogs booger for him/her

thumb_up thumb_down -29

When I fart in public, I always pretend that nothing ever happened.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Sit at your desk at work and think to yourself "is this it? I feel like I was meant for something bigger, like being an actor or a real life hero." then you look around you and feel bad because you feel like you dumped on everyone else who seem happy wih their lives. Then you go back to your boring desk job anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

I cant ride a bike

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Turn shower water all the way up hot before getting out because it feels good

thumb_up thumb_down -43

I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Show all your friends this website to prove your not as strange as they think you are.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

thumb_up thumb_down -47

see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

thumb_up thumb_down -51

I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

thumb_up thumb_down -61

I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Sorry I posted last comment 3 times. And it is best ever not beat ever.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

thumb_up thumb_down -73

I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

thumb_up thumb_down -77

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.