watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

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Always cover yourself in the bathroom mirror at home because you have this strange feeling that people at school are all watching you through your mirror~pls tell me im not the only one who ever feels this~oh well

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I never side with the majority (if given a choice.)

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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Sometimes I won't do something just to see how long it takes before someone else does it (dishes, throw something away, fill the ice cube tray, etc.).

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I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

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I think about other women when having sex

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

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Spend countless hours looking at cars online I know I'll never be able to afford

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Think it's awesome when I look at a clock and it reads the same numbers that my address starts with.

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Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Kill Jb without getting aressted.

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HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *end of special message just for you*

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Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

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Sitting down in the shower

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I can't piss with my shoes on.

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Know almost every line from spongbob episodes.

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All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

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Boinked my neighbor

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When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

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When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

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Go to bed at 9 am and then regret whole day is wasted

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.