I Masturbate Daily.

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Wonder if the life your living is one long dream and your gonna wake up and be some type of alien.

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Whenever you shave, you make sure you cut both ends of your moustache, leaving a small patch in the middle above your lips. Then you pretend to be Hitler ;)

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Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.

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Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

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When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

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I blow my nose in my towel after i dry off. Then use the same towel the next day. lol

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Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

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don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

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When I fap at friends house, I use mobile data instead of his wifi incase history can be seen

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Pretend my ski pole is a gun while I'm on the chair lift. Or just any object around when I'm not skiing.

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When it is raining and a sad song comes on the radio, I look out the window and pretend I am in a movie. -Cocobear

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Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

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feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

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When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

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Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

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You think about all the stupid things you did in elementary school and avoid anyone who went to your elementary school in high school.

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it is not disgusting to bite your toe nails, it is a skill

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Invented a special password for yourself in order to recognize yourself if travel through time.

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When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

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I wonder if elections are rigged?

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When receiving instructions from people one on one, whether it's a man or a woman, I wonder what they would do if I kissed them while they are talking.

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my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.