Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

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Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

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I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

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Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

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I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

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Sitting on toilet after pooping without wiping for longer than a minute because your in your phone.

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I was the real Stig...

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Always have your feet under the cover, and if not, you think that something will get you.

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

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A mix of Slenderman and Herobrine would be the ideal husband for me. >:)

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looking at the last page of thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com to see how weird some people are...

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Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

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I wonder if sport games are rigged?

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try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

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whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

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Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

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I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

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not be afraid of hurricane sandy

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Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.