- Things You Think Only You Do

only read the short jokes on this website

When a book is boring, i will think of my favouite song and then i will start singing the book, like i will look at the words and ligit, start singing them in my favourite tune~im so weird

Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

Look in the fridge 10 times without eating anything

I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

i put a empty pack of cigarettes under my pillow and hoped the cigarette fairy would come when i was asleep

Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

if I see submissions above mine get thumbs up but not mine I will put them down

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Pretend you and your classmates are in a Hunger Games scenario.

eat curry and don't complain about its spiciness ...if you're not white

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.