Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

A mix of Slenderman and Herobrine would be the ideal husband for me. >:)

Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

looking at the last page of thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com to see how weird some people are...

Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

I wonder if sport games are rigged?

whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

not be afraid of hurricane sandy

Random strong urge to squeeze immensely cute pet.

Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

Save more than once on your favourite game.

Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

Sometimes, for no real reason, I'll make strange or funny noises when no one is around.

Playing hide-and-seek and finding the best spot ever, only to realize you have to pee

I watch American football with the sound down low because the announcers are always trying to tell us that we didn't see what we just saw when the referees make bad calls

Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

Think of the most awkward or dreadful thing you could possibly do in any given situation and be almost compelled to do it but then realising that you could never show your face anywhere ever again if you did.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.