When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

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after seeing toy story, and watching that toys moved and talked to each other when the humans werent around, thinking that toys are really like that when you gone, and when you go back to you room, the toys rush back into their spots.

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Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

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When i'm home, I pretend i'm famous!

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Get really annoyed when something interrupts your yawn... then try and force yourself to complete the yawn

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I always find myself criticizing some commercials on television like the first time I see them I think nothing of it but the third or fourth time I think hey wait a second...

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Pretend my life is a videogame.

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When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

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Whenever I accidentally drop a glass or cup it always bounces the first time but breaks the second

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look at bins as i walk past them

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Fantasize about taking over the world, and killing all religious people.

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I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

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Use the letters on my phone to make words to help me remember important numbers

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try to give your friends spirit animals

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I always get paranoid when I go to take a shit because I leave the computer on and somebody comes in the room where the computer is.

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speak proper english

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When walking on stairs, always counting how many of them there are.

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I have memorized my drivers license registration number

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Do a light cough when in the toilet when there isn't no lock on the door so Ur stop someone walking in!!!

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Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.