Make fun of someone for something. Then realize you do the same thing

Make a weird face when taking a picture with a friend, never see the picture, so you try to remake the face you did in a mirror to see how stupid you looked...

When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

touching something (like a crack in a wall) and then thinking to yourself that your the only person thats ever touched it..

Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

always get sports injuries, never get any attention from them

Having a deja vu, swearing you've seen something before.

Look at adigital clock sideways when in bed while tryingto sleep and try to make the numbers look like faces

When I fart in public, I always pretend that nothing ever happened.

I have to put the radio volume in multiples of three and my daughter has to put it in multiples of five so when we are together it either has to be on 15 or 30.

When i go into a public toilet and one of the cubical doors is slightly shut, I will be really quiet or slightly push the door to see if anyone is in there.

I don't use my car air conditioning because I think it's wasteful and it might "run-out" when I'm REALLY, REALLY hot.

When light goes off and cant see digital clock numbers when you are trying to sleep/wake up, i scream and get terrified because i think i got blind

When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.

I refuse to take dump with the shower curtain closed. I know someone's behind it...

Justin Beiber is a woman

When I meet someone random, and have a small conversation, and then when they leave, I feel sad because I think I am never going to see them again.

I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.