How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

thumb_up thumb_down -16

In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I refuse to take dump with the shower curtain closed. I know someone's behind it...

thumb_up thumb_down -20

sometimes when i fart i feel like i pooped a little in my underwear but tell myself ''no i didn't'' but feel poopy until i check.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Mares really turn me on, so I download "bad stuff" Ironically though, I worked at a farm last summer and realized there is nothing more disgusting than reality. Still mares turn me on... If on video.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

When I'm around people, I sometimes yell in my head "STOP READING MY MIND! I KNOW YOU'RE DOING IT, SO STOP!" just in case.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Listening to music walking through town and feeling like you're in a music video

thumb_up thumb_down -26

When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Make odd grunting noises and sighs of relief while going #2.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

thumb_up thumb_down -28

moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

thumb_up thumb_down -32

blink

thumb_up thumb_down -34

When I'm on a site that requires you to login with Facebook or Twitter to leave a comment, I click on the names of the nice looking ones to go see their pages to add them to my friends list.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

After eating a sandwich, eat the leftover sesame seeds one-by-one.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

You take showers on school morning because you like to stand there under the hot water just thinking about life while your warm

thumb_up thumb_down -40

I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

not eating the ends of a hotdog.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.