fart then blame it on the guy next to me realizing theres no one near me and everyone looks at me....awkward

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sometimes i mouth improvised, ridiculous sentences in the mirror to see what i look like when i talk to people

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get annoyed when the pop-up lid on the dish soap bottle is left up

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When i go into a public toilet and one of the cubical doors is slightly shut, I will be really quiet or slightly push the door to see if anyone is in there.

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In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

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If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

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I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

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when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

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talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

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When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

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feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

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I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

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CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

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Covering the movement sensors with toilet paper on public toilets incase it's a secret camera.

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Look at my poo before I flush it.

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Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

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Check the lint filter on the dryer every time I walk into the laundry room.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

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Still record on VHS tapes.

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Moisturize "down there" after a really drying wipe session.

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Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

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Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

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I hid money in a jar behind a brick in the house I lived in and forgot about it. I've since moved to another state but I didn't remember I left the cash behind until years later.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.