Look at my poo before I flush it.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

thumb_up thumb_down -40

listen to madonnas new album

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Rubbing the corners of your lips on the side of your hand and smelling it.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

thumb_up thumb_down -48

When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

when you hear "tartar sauce" you think that it's actually made from tartar -MATT

thumb_up thumb_down -60

I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

Go through a bunch of the boxes with the messed up letters (The ones making sure your not a robot) trying to find one you like. Then, click the refresh button and realize that the last one might have been the best one you were going to get.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Feeling very uncomfortable for days, untill your motivation finally reaches that point when you start learning for the exam.

thumb_up thumb_down -80

I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

thumb_up thumb_down -128

Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Think that my ice tastes different than my water.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

When i go into a public toilet and one of the cubical doors is slightly shut, I will be really quiet or slightly push the door to see if anyone is in there.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I never feel bored

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

thumb_up thumb_down -23

There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

thumb_up thumb_down -29

use tweezers to pull out leg hair or armpit hair out of sheer boredom.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.