After waking up from being extremely intoxicated the night before, i check my phone and ALL my accounts on the internet to make sure i didnt make an ass of myself.

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Knowing and feeling that the whole world is out to get me............ And only me......... I know.......... Weird right??????

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Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

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At any time of day, when i'm not busy, someone you know pops into your head and you start talking to them telepathically, but not for long, then you realise that youre just plain crazy? anyone?

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test how many stares you can scale in one step

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Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

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try to rip the top off an Oreo without messing up the cream and then if the cream comes out on both parts not wanting to eat the Oreo because its wrong.

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When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

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Comment on here and wait a few days and see if I got some likes . CMOOON , You do it .

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Mostly make fun of my best friends but never make fun of just regular friends

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put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

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I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

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rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

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I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

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touching something (like a crack in a wall) and then thinking to yourself that your the only person thats ever touched it..

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like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.