- Things You Think Only You Do

i fap in the bathroom because its the only room i have a reason to lock the door in.

When texting someone on the toilet & they ask, "What are you doing?" I respond with, "Oh, just chillin." LOL. -Jade

blink

RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

I Think people can read my mind....."if you can read my mind nod your head or don't if you don't want me to know that you can" It doesn't work either way but yeah thats just me lol

Drum on the chair between your legs and wonder if people think that you're playing with yourself.

The only time I seem to look at the clock is when the numbers read my birth date.

I read these not only for fun, but to feel in touch with my humanity.

When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

if I see submissions above mine get thumbs up but not mine I will put them down

i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

I tilt my head back and eat grapes pretending like im a greek god

I Masturbate Daily.

Think about breathing...

Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

putting your hand in the water in the back of the toilet and thinking its gross toilet water and get grossed out

Legally changing your name to Peter Jankins just cuz

Think that the person driving keeps staring at me when ever they look in the mirror and I'm sat in the back.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.