Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

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Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."

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Having gay sex

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when u get something right and do a victory dance and the person to u is just like "da hell?"

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I have the idea that i'm the only one who looks at this site.

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Read posts on this website and realize there are a lot of weirdos in the world.

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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Feeling self conscious about breathing to loudly

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Tough but loving hands!! Mmm them calluses tho!! ^_^

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When you sit down to use the toilet, start, and then realize that the window is open and people can hear you.You then either search for something to mask the sound or proceed to relieve yourself by making as little noise as possible (ultimately failing)

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When at someone else's house, trying to use the bathroom, keep a very close eye on the door just to make sure nobody's gonna walk in on you...

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Put my finger over one pixel of my digital alarm clock, because I know that's the only one that will change in the next minute. Take it off. MAGIC.

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See a sexy girl, wanna go up and talk to her....cant think of anything cool to say and afraid of denial. Just me?

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Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

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After waking up from being extremely intoxicated the night before, i check my phone and ALL my accounts on the internet to make sure i didnt make an ass of myself.

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I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

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listen to madonnas new album

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

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I never even met you! Why do you care who I'm talking to?

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CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

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After brushing my teeth I used to suck the water from it

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as soon as i put some mint gum in my mouth, i sneeze countless times.

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when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.