when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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When I am making submissions to this site I sometimes accidentally put them in the comment section

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i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

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Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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I'm not bad looking and I don't fall into the beautiful category either but I really feel good about the way I look

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Wanting to change your name to Peter Jankins

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I wonder if elections are rigged?

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Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

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I still hum songs that I made up when I was a little kid

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Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

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I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

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Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

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Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

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Thinking something embarrassing, then having to talk to someone and suddenly getting worried you are about to blurt out your thoughts

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I lift my butt when I'm farting

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While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

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Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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If I'm in the car looking for an address or a street name I'll turn down the radio. Why?

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Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.