- Things You Think Only You Do

For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

I cant ride a bike

When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

When I'm watching a video on YouTube, I repeatedly click on the video slider section below the video because I feel uncomfortable not doing it, ever since I realized that you can't move to different parts of the video with your keyboard without clicking there first.

I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

when passing someone in a car beside you, you try to wonder where they are going just by looking at them, their clothes or their expressions

When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

Smoking in the shower.

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

Something that bothers me is when a movie sequel comes out and for whatever reason the same things from the first movie happens so they just end up making the same movie

Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

Having more dificulty thinking in your native language than your 2nd or 3rd one. Or 4th one. Or... the rest. I highly doubt that one's common.

standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.