Something that bothers me is when a movie sequel comes out and for whatever reason the same things from the first movie happens so they just end up making the same movie

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When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

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When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

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i masturbate with my feet

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Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

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you know that when things have only one like on this site, the people who wrote it liked it

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

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I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

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Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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Never step on manholes, because I'm afraid to fall in.

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The older I get the more honest I get

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Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

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Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

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Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

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Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

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Pretend I'm a back-up dancer or singing a duet with the singer of the song I'm listening to.

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Wondering if your life is a TV show, and people are watching what you do.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.